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The Devil Tree EP

by Fossil

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1.
dad met mom on christmas day she was dancing at candy's over on diamond way the same day they carved that sixteen year old from that unmarked grave the killer had been slashing up girls since may her name was jeanette she was in the 10th grade pretty as a holiday her dad said he'd miss her every day mom was eighteen already queen of the stripper scene dad was hometown pride just out of westfield high he threw that game winning touch down that made the whole town cry in june he tried to kiss the town goodbye but our town just won't let a man slide so he worked on that oil rig in the gulf for a time but he was back by july back at his daddy's shop patching big rig tires barely 18 and already sick and tired mom said dad was waiting for her every night after she got off stage he'd drive her to breakneck ridge just so they could smell the sage he'd kiss her tell her he loved her and that she'd never have to dance again if he had it his way then another girl was found dead barely seventeen a sunburned redhead dad promised to keep mom safe they were sitting in his car wild horses playing on an eight track tape she told him she was pregnant he disappeared the next day one night mom told me i was a mistake that was pure heartbreak i still think of it every day dad loved mom for a winter and spring promised her the moon a diamond ring while all around teenage girls were dying for nothing their bodies floating in lakes buried in shallow graves where was my old man to keep my mom safe and then after nine months he would give me his name he'd take me up to breakneck ridge we'd sit in that field of sage he'd drive me out to butterfly bay just to watch the waves we'd carve our names in the sand he'd show me the whole world tell me this your promised land he'd toss me in the dirt show me how to be a man some nights i dream he's liftin me up pullin me outta this rut he'd show me the way tell me not worry then he'd tell me this story how he first saw my moms face how he met a beautiful girl named grace dancing at candy's on christmas day electric black firelight the same dream every night i'm your son i was your seed and i grew up into this devil tree and now i just pray that you come back come back to cut me down and save whatever's left of me
2.
what if god is the devil dreaming this nightmare down at the spirit level and what if daddy never left what if god could commit a sin other than theft maybe he had us fooled all along gave us those broken psalms and just like my dad whenever i need him he's just fucking gone see god gave us father's so wed know about hurt words so we'd know how curse and he gave us this life so we'd have nowhere else to turn then he gave us needles and veins so mickey and i could kill the pain we bought a bundle of juice in the wake of news every headline reading: you're born to lose so we tied our blood in knots took turns giving each other those poison shots every day we ran that freight train through our veins i remember mickey sitting back smiling saying i think we've been saved those weren't even our darkest days faded out and dazed every  light turned gray mickey and i pissed the next 6 months away thought maybe it'll be better tomorrow a day where nothing goes wrong the radio plays your favorite song but tomorrow's always too late and yesterday's always gone always the same fate melissa found us on new year's day we were squattin on parker place 180 days since i'd even seen my own face melissa introduced me to one-eye ray said he could get me straight but the whole time i was just bait all ray wanted to do was dance on my grave ray had me runnin numbers  for change and scraps just a rodent on my way to a mousetrap heard from mickey that ray had a bad rap he said we should head east  make some real cash instead i just waited for things to go bad ray sent me to breakneck junction told me there was a truckload comin all i had to do was drive it back to that high street bunker but there was no truck just bad luck three thugs thats where it all got fucked someone had to take a hit  see ray owed money all over sun valley and he figured no one would miss some bastard dope addict sometimes i wish i'd died so i wouldn't have had to run and hide wouldn't have had to look melissa in the eye and she never would've seen me cry but maybe she was setting me up that whole time   so i snuck in to ray's  found my daddy's name and all his debts scratched out in that cook book ray found me said your dad was nothin but a lowlife crook and that i had was just his bastard son and i had his eyes his same look once men lose trust it all just turns to dust i ran back to my truck escaped with some kinda luck i found mickey the next day told him we'd do it my way so we drove to over lucky's in the old stingray three bullets and my uncle benny's gun at my hip i stood in the window watching ray drinking red wine and gin i had one bullet for him  one for the bar man serving him and one bullet for god if i ever find him stood there frozen thought of my mom and mickey and tess and frankie uncle benny that midnight alley the old days in the trash the trees made of ash i wondered who would miss me if this all goes bad so i put the gun away and climbed back in that stingray told mickey to keep driving till we're a million miles away
3.
shoulda died out there on that county line but i stayed with you that night sat at lucky's bar drinkin tanqueray and wine thought we had forever thought we had all the time i shoulda been with em on 4th and drake coulda saved danny and nate a million years of heartache they'd been out there day waiting for that shipment to come their way cops caught up with em at butterfly bay heard danny floored it laughin the whole way both of em did six months in that county cage but if i could relive that night i'd do it the same way and if you let me love you forever i'd never make another mistake i'll wash my hands of all that dirt and waste runaway leave this town to disintegrate but for people like us it doesn't just go that way love ends in bad blood and heartbreak regret that u just can't shake now i just wish i'd known u for more than a night and a day i came around to tell your sister i missed u she just spit in my face said all id done was hurt u i waited outside your house with a box of lovesick songs saw you kissing jacy's brother dwayne on your front lawn life goes on and on so i'm sorry danny and i'm sorry nate i'm sorry for all the heartache and i'm sorry mom i'm sorry dad i''d give anything to see your face i still got that picture of you and mom on butterfly bay i keep it with my cards close to my heart i still look at it every day and I promise there'll be no more bad luck no more bad love no more midnight transgression and if you need me i'll be selling prayers on the wrong side of heaven
4.
sat out on butterfly bay waiting out the rain put my daddy's jack-knife in the sand drew a heart around melissa's name i still think of her every day it seems like a million years ago when we'd build fires in that sand i held her hand the cassette in the tape deck playing i'm your man smoked till our lungs were sore blew halos off to those lost souls from the muddy shore that was it all i needed her life nothing more but god had other things in store and u can't stop whats comin some nights just cut ya to the core melissa's mom got sick after her brother matty came back from the war her mom died that autumn melissa found her on the kitchen floor her eyes still open a note that read: i prayed for so much more i found melissa and matty that night outside that high street tavern she said u cant understand and you'll never know what it is to be man i reached for her hand matty held me back said u got nothing unless u can bring back the past i looked him in the eye melissa said he watched his best friend die held him there in the dirt no words for that kinda hurt i could curse god curse my whole lot but if you don't move on you'll just be left to rot so i took a job at my uncle's shop past melissa's house every day my mom told me things would be ok you lose something but tomorrow's a new day mom said when i was a little she'd take me to butterfly bay we'd build castles out of clay she said you'll be king of the world one day
5.
The Runner 02:52
the last time anyone saw her she was running that marathon headed for the finish line wish someone could've told her in time how could she have known that for the last year she was training to die i knew her as the girl next door she used babysit my kid sister and i all day long we'd play on the floor and when i saw them carry her into that grave i wished all those memories would just go away cause the good times are the hardest to shake and if i could see her I'd tell her you remind me of that innocent time before all the bad luck and the midnight drives because you once looked out for me and who was there for you at the end when you were runnin no idea what was comin where's the world that once held you the world that knew you i still sing your life to the wind that calls for you your daddy told the church you were his only one and he loved to watch you run but i always wondered what you were running from when you'd pass our house under that fading sun and did you think i'd become this way smoking dimes and white every single day full of rage filled with pain and at the end did the lord call your name this life means nothing if like that you can be taken away all for runnin a race trying to get somewhere trying to find your place whoever dropped that bomb that day they can take your life but they can't take you away cause all of us still remember you every day
6.
Benny 02:04
uncle benny left home at sixteen took a job cutting steel at that torch lake factory and every friday he sent becky half his salary she was back home  still wearing his chain writing him letters telling him she missed him every day then benny came home for a night that fall jimmy told him he'd seen becky kissing mike at sammy's  pool hall saw becky she looked benny in the eye kissed his face benny just smiled pretending to feel something for her other than hate came back the next weekend drove straight to the pool hall business as usual found mike outside in his truck benny opened the door grabbed his neck didn't let go till mike was an inch from death mikey's dad was the town mayor back then so benny knew what was waiting for him they put him in the country pen filled a rubber nose with cement cuffed him to the bed beat him for seven days straight  till he was almost dead. when they let him out they said they didn't wanna see him around he could either leave town or they'd put him straight in the ground benny told me that was the best day of his life he drove to cali that night met denise serving drinks on the sunset strip and they got married that same week under the neon moon of vegas strip that was back in 86 trouble came trouble went but he loved denise ever since told her when he leaves this world she's the only thing he's gonna miss
7.
mickey climbed the devil tree just to see what he could see but the old town was dead black as autumn leaves it was time to leave the last time i saw him was on that oil rig off the coast of galveston he said we can't stop what's comin then he shook my hand said i'll see you again i looked in his eyes saw nothing but fear our oil stained faces hiding all our tears and the lines on our palms showed no future they were just maps of wasted years he said he'd be back by july i nodded tried not to cry  then that was that we said goodbye the next day mickey hopped a train found new york city in the pouring rain he met those hustlers at his big brother jake's place they gave him a nickname taught him how to make some quick change barely eighteen and already a 14th street saint dealing to bowery bums hustling with backstreet snakes by january he met angeline out in the cold on st. marks place she was a pale eyed drag queen runaway mickey thought he could play her game she got him back on juice and together they numbed the pain they stayed up at that old hotel for seven days changed their names he put her blood in his veins they promised they'd never leave that place angeline said she forgot her daddy's face and the letters tattooed on her back spelled HATE she came from the sonora bay she'd escaped the worst kinda of fate she left home at 15 survived a million miles of bad road and broken dreams found midnight streets bad men dogs in heat fucked everyone of em just so she could eat i could love u forever she said mickey and her were lying in bed mickey looked up at the ceiling light thought of death then laid his head on her chest they started coming down as the sun came out nothing worse than sunlight shining on two kids strung out after all drugs have run out so they waited for the night then hit the street met mickey's brother jake on brighton beach jake looked at angeline asked mickey what he was doin with a whore then set his baby brother up for that bad score three hours later mickey was knocking on the devil's door wide-eyed veins pounding all he could think of was junk and how he could get more then the cops rushed him bashed his head hard on the floor he couldn't help wondering what he'd left home for mickey spent one month locked in that cell on canal street shivering on the concrete. grinding his teeth nightmares of brighton beach and where angeline was gonna sleep 31 nights in that tomb 31 nightmares in the devil's womb thoughts angeline their old hotel room three words in his head: see you soon when he got out he ran straight to st. marks place found angeline barely alive he promised her they'd escape he told her to meet him at midnight on 42nd and 8th they'd catch that late night train to that somewhere place angeline was shaking crying begging him to stay but mickey was long gone off to jake's place his granddad taught him to put his enemies in shallow graves his mom told him to look the other way but this was blood on blood so mickey had to do it his way he dragged his knife across jake's face told him he had no right to wear their father's name then he left him there to bleed out whispered this is your fate he took angeline back to that texas valley held her hand promised one day he'd show her cali they'd run circles around a new earth he'd be the man she deserved no surrender no retreat mickey would cry in his sleep and when him and angeline found the beach he told her: i am my fathers seed in the dirt he planted me and i grew up into this devil tree now i just want you to cut me down and save what's left of me

about

"Mickey was a silent light, and he was alwayz burnin. He left a trail of true bluez from Galveston to NYC, then back to Sun Valley. I'll see ya again he told me, and that was the last thing he told me. Trouble seems to find men who leave their hearts open. His was blood on blood. Once men lose trust it all just turns to dust. Mickey put that juice in veins to try and stop all the hurt, thinking it might bring him and Angeline closer to God. The ones who are brave enough to love and live seem to get the worst hand. And when I pass Butterfly Bay at night I still think off all of em...Melissa and Mickey and mom and dad. This was before Tommy and Rachel and after Tess and Frankie. Mom still says I'm just like dad, but dad left so I guess should too. I'll be back around one these nights, but for now I'm headin down this road, all the old days and dreams in that rearview dust. It's time leave. So long for now. See ya on the wrong side of Heaven." Luv Alwayzz, Foszzil

credits

released July 7, 2013

words and voice by fossil
beat by teen daze/two bicycles

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